HumoUr (the "u" is the for Brits)

Things to do with people who are sleeping:
1) Insert small, non-harmful objects into their gaping mouths.
2) Give them the finger to their face.
3) Say whimsical things like “You like looking at old men having gay sex. If you agree, signify by doing nothing.”
4) Carefully place their hand on their own genitals or yours.
5) Pile blankets, pillows and other shit on their face.
6) Wake them up by smacking them with a pillow as hard as you possibly can.
7) Softly say “fuck you, dickhead” and laugh as they do nothing in response.
8) Very gently trace the inside of their nostril, so the irritation causes them to slap themselves in the face.